Tag Archives: confused

How to get un-confused

Does it feel like sometimes the only thing you’re clear on is that you’re feeling confused?

Here’s how to get un-confused:

1. Stop saying ‘I’m confused.’

When we say “I’m confused” – we’re reaffirming being confused. We’re actually intending it. And that creates… yup, more confused.

You actually aren’t confused at all. You’re in a very specific process of discovery to which you can’t foresee the future path (very few of us can).

Just roll with it.

2. Get curious!

Ask questions. Wonder about it. Be playful. Trust you know the answers.

Feel what it feels like to feel open and clear. What it feels like to be at the cusp of a great realization, and then… let go of all your ideas of what it *should* be like and just let it be what it is.

Often, our insistance on this whole being confused thing is happening because we’re having an inner conflict about the answers we’re getting.

Don’t fight it!

3. Go do something else instead.

If you’re ‘confused,’ the LAST thing you need to spend more time doing is thinking about whatever you’re trying to figure out.

The more you try, the closer you get to it. The closer you get to it, the less you can see what’s actually going on.

At this point, you’re probably in major frustration mode. Frustration and clarity are like oil and water. It aint gonna happen right now!

Walk. Away.

Go do something FUN. Something OPENING. Something that makes you giggle and see the world in a new way.

EXPAND.

Put the soundtrack of your life in your ears, go outside and take a nice long walk.

Breathe deep.

Cry.

Lay in the grass.

4. Let it happen.

Look up at the sky and see how big and empty it is. That’s the space you need to feel in order for the answers come fill it.

And they will.

When all the pressure to find the *right* answers is gone, when you’re least expecting it, you’ll get that flash of insight.

And don’t forget to tell the universe… thank you.

gimme space!

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It’s OKAY to change your mind. And your focus.

I got my first graphic design job in 1998, the summer after my junior year of high school. I went on to be a yearbook editor, major in media art, design for ad agencies and creative direct for a print house. But a few years ago, I started to question whether design was really for me.

I just wasn’t all that happy doing the work. So when I started my own business, I forced myself out of being a graphic designer…

I changed my LinkedIn profile.

I took all the design offerings out of my programs.

I sent out an email to everyone I know announcing my new biz.

I was so happy to tell the whole world what I was up to. I announced it all over the place – on Facebook, Twitter, in workshop forums. I had new programs that were 100% coaching. It felt amazing. I felt free! I didn’t have to do this thing that felt draining.

Since I had decided to ditch what I had been doing for the last 14 years of my life, I embarked on a “find my purpose and passion journey.” Much to my frustration, design kept popping back up for me…

In journalling for workshops I was doing.

In my obsession with pretty things.

All over the life story I wrote out to see what skills, interestes, and experience I had to draw from.

In client and friend reactions to my ditching design – “Congrats! Awe, are you sure? You’re so good at it!”

I tried my hardest to push it all away, but it was a part of me. So I took a look at what had really been making me unhappy. And I realized, it wasn’t the design! It was that my work wasn’t always helping people.

I saw the jobs I enjoyed most were for the clients who used nicely designed materials as well thought out tools to further their message. The rest of the clients meant well but hadn’t fully hit on their message yet. Which also meant, they were kind of a nightmare to work with because they had no idea what they wanted and were never happy with the end result.

There it was:

The prettiest designs in the world can’t help us if we don’t know what we’re trying to do! And the best designer in the world can’t make us the thing that perfectly represents us if we don’t know what we’re trying to represent.

So, with my new understanding and renewed love for design, I’ve put together a program that combines getting super clear on what your biz is all about, the experience you want to create for your clients AND a kick-ass web suite to match.

Introducing Jumpstart!  (Check it out!)